SHAPE YOUR THOUGHTS

Momote looks at the canvas.
What she painted does not convince her at all.
She runs her hand through her two-tone hair, squinting to get a better look at her details.

“It’s all wrong,” says an echo that only she hears.

Momote shakes her head.
She blinks her eyelids a few times.
“This is not the time to give up. Let’s try to change our approach…”

A few minutes later, she tries to amend the painting, but the satisfaction does not come.
“Oh, come on!” she snorts in frustration.
She throws down the brush.
Not being able to realize her ideas cause her a lot of discomforts.

Momote crosses her arms.
Furrowed eyebrows.
She turns her back on the canvas.

“All wrong,” repeats the echo.

The years spent in solitude come to mind―years in which they denied her the opportunity to express herself―when everyone ignored her.
The only comfort then was reading and painting.
And failing to paint is something that she cannot accept at the moment.

“All right. Let’s start over.”
Momote moves the used canvas, places it on the ground and puts an empty one on the easel.
She nods determinedly and resumes painting.
“Let’s try to study the composition better…”

More minutes pass.
The canvas is messed up again.
Momote moves a corner of her mouth in annoyance.
“Again! This time we change everything!”

Quick strokes of the brush.
Puffs and exasperated noises.
What Momote sees on her canvas does not satisfy her.
Those lines make no sense to her.
She doesn’t even finish the sketch. The canvas is replaced again.
“It’s the last time!”

Minutes pass.
The canvas is thrown to the ground and kicked away.
“Enough! I don’t want to know anything about it! ”
The previous canvases also follow the same fate.

Disappointment and frustration are emotions that contrast her two natures.
A part of herself would like to continue and affirm her existence by showing off her abilities and kindness.
On the other hand, the other part would like to destroy everything. To avenge the wrongs suffered and to affirm one’s existence by force.

“You are wrong. Accept it.”
“No, it’s not true. They are the ones who have made me believe it for years.”
“And doesn’t that make you angry? Wouldn’t you like to take revenge? ”
“Why should I do this? It wouldn’t give me any joy.”
“Look what you did. You let yourself go and destroyed everything.”
“It was a coincidence, a mistake…”
“You are a mistake!”
“IT IS NOT TRUE!”
Scream of release and despair.
Momote kneels on the ground, putting her hands in her hair.

“Momote. Momote… My little sister.”
Her hand strokes her shoulder.
Momote looks up, her eyes wet with tears.
“What happens?”
Huffie’s reassuring smile manages to calm her mood.
She wipes the tears with the back of her hand.
“What I want to do… I can’t…”
Her throat feels knotted.
Huffie hands her a handkerchief, then helps her up.
“Failing isn’t necessarily bad. Each attempt brings you closer to the result, and the more the result is important to you, the more attempts you will have to make.”
Momote nods.
“It’s hard,” she says, wiping her eyes.
Huffie smiles.
“Because you are ambitious, my sister. You always have been, and you will never stop being,”
Momote barely smiles.
“It was a moment … Maybe I should slow down a bit.”
Huffie nods.
“Slow down without stopping.”
Huffie looks at the canvases on the ground, and it is no longer clear what they represent.
“May I ask what you were working on? Maybe I can help you with some ideas.”
Momote smiles.
“I wanted to portray the two of us. The two of us together smiling, looking forward.”
Huffie slowly hugs her sister.
“It’s an excellent idea. Can I help you make it happen?”
Momote nods conspicuously.
“I would be really happy.”

Experiencing negative moments of despair is entirely normal.
Unfortunately, Momote knew perfectly well.
You don’t necessarily need to fight a bad mood; you often have to know how to accept it.
Huffie was her point of reference and guide, and Momote was grateful every day.
The portrait was ready in less than a day, showing the two sisters observing a vast and opportunity-filled future.
“It’s beautiful.”
Momote nods.
“It’s also thanks to you.”
Huffie hugs her sister, placing her cheek on her head.
“Helping you shape your thoughts is something I love to do and will always do.”
Momote returns her hug.
“Thank you, big sister.”